dear 2020

Dear 2020,

I'm not going to lie, for the most part, you were pretty shitty. We had our own, personal beef as a result of my canceled spring break trip to Europe, the missing second half of my senior year of college, the fact that I'll never get to graduate from college with my family and friends at Camp Randall, (fellow badgers you know what I'm talking about), and the looming uncertainty about my future you held over my head for the majority of the year. 

But beyond our own problems, you also robbed millions of people of their lives, loved ones, milestones, and livelihoods. And if that wasn't enough, you forced us to deal with worldwide political turmoil, to watch POC continue to be attacked in their own cities, and cope with putting all of our lives on indefinite pause. So yeah, I get it when the majority position of those celebrating the new year is 'fuck 2020.' There are countless reasons for us to feel that way. 

Yet, you weren't all bad. Despite all the suckitude you brought my way, there was also so much good that came with the bad. So much so that I will always look back on you, 2020, as one of the best. Okay maybe not one of the best, but pretty damn good.

I started the year coming off a 4.0 GPA from my 2019 Fall semester, a goal that had been on my last 7 New Years Resolutions lists but remained unachieved until that moment. Then, even despite the absence of a proper graduation ceremony, I did graduate from college with two majors after three years of intense work. 

In March, I completed a Whole30, something I never thought I'd be able to do. While I don't imagine I'll ever do it again, my Whole30 completely reshaped my relationship with food, nutrition, and my overall health, for which I will always be grateful. This newfound relationship led to me create this website, which, in turn, helped me document my amazing experiences in Israel, and allowed me to fall in love with cooking and gain a hobby for life. The only downside is that my mom and her kitchen had to suffer six months of my creative, yet slightly messy, cooking style.     

In those six months of living at home, I also got the chance to rediscover and redefine my relationship with my parents. After suddenly moving home at 21 years old and then moving away halfway around the world, our relationship took a few major beatings. But we came out stronger for it and now I look forward to our daily phone calls and can't wait for my parents to visit me in Israel. 

I had the opportunity to build a relationship with some of my cousins that I never would have had otherwise. We lived together in the middle of nowhere in Penn Yann, NY and I had a chance to actually relax for a month and do nothing but read books, snuggle with doggos, and swim each day. I've never actually used the word 'glorious' to describe anything in my life before but I think that might be the most suitable word to describe my month at Keuka Lake. 

I jumped out of a fucking plane. I moved to a new country and made best friends for life. I got out of my comfort zone in more ways than I thought possible and had one of the most wonderful birthdays of my life. 2020, in spite of all the shit you threw my way, you gave me the opportunity to learn more about myself, who I want to be, and what I want to get out of my life, and I'm so glad you did. I look back on this year and feel so lucky; with all the bad stuff came an unheard-of amount of joy and love and kindness. 

You were one of the craziest years of my life, which is odd considering how much of it I spent in my sweatpants in Potomac, Maryland. But I'm proud because this time last year I felt stuck. I felt like I hadn't moved forward in years and was struggling with the same obstacles I faced at 17 years old. But now, I can safely say that 2020 helped me grow into the best version of myself yet. I'm no longer haunted by the problems I faced before, I have new, more exciting, and complicated challenges to overcome. But, after getting through 2020 with my sanity semi-intact, I feel like I can do anything. 

xx, lindz